Last week I attended my 2nd to last nutrition class at Florida Hospital and was told my weight loss was not up to par. as in I lost 3lbs in 5 months. oye.

Well thats part of the reason i am getting this surgery, I have a hard time losing weight. Always have. My next class is Feb 6th or 28th. I can attend either one and I usually go at the end of the month. However, this will be my last month of the class and I REALLY want to get the ball rolling on the surgery. So, I plan on attending the one at the beginning of the month

The clincher is that I need to lose at least 3lbs by then and seeing that it took me 5months to lose 3lbs up until this point, I needed to do something different. I decided to follow Slim fast for the next week and see if the misery of liquid meals and constant hunger could at least get me to where I need to be so the surgery approval could go forward.

This is day one and I'm HUNGRY. Its only for a week though so I plan on suffering through it. It stinks but at least it allows me to get used to the amount of food I will be allowed to eat post op, which isnt a lot.

One day down, 6 more to go. Fingers crossed.

part of my pre-op requirement was to get a psych eval. I ended up taking some written and online tests and then spoke with the doc about my results. My scores were interesting and (much to my surprise) pretty accurate. It basically confirmed that I am a very anxious guarded introvert who avoids social interaction due to my low self-esteem and self-criticism as well as my inability to say no to people to the point that I eventually end up overextending myself to the point that I say eff you and ruin friendships/ relationships/ opportunites. In a nutshell. Not to mention that I am terrible with authority and refuse to follow rules because I feel like I am being pushed around. Wow. Needless to say, she recommended meds and therapy, haha.

So I made the appointment with my dr and started Celexa 2 days ago. I'm not sure if its due to the meds themselves or the fact that I really want them to work but I do feel a little better. I slept remarkably well the first night, not as well the 2nd night though. I did wake up thinking about somthing that was worrying me (cant remember what) but I was able to fall back asleep, which rarely happens. I usually end up getting up so that was an improvement.

She also prescribed meds for my chronic headaches which she thinks are due to stress. So far the headaches havent been as bad and when I do feel one coming on I pop a pill and it ceases to come to fruition. Thats also positive since those were annoying.

I'm relieved to be on meds. I so believe it is the best choice for me given my history with prozac which also helped in the past.

Here's hoping!

Bad Kitty

Merlin was literally caught in the act of urinating on Chris's shorts that were on the floor. This is quite unlike him. piggy has been known to pee on things rarely but not Merlin. Its been ongoing since we found a few more spots around the house. Grrrr....

Ive been monitoring his blood glucose levels and they have been in normal range the past few times. Maybe its the insulin. Maybe he has reverted and is no longer diabetic. I've seen that happen a few times in cats over the years.

Monday he has an appointment with Dr. O. It will SUCK taking him in as he morphs into a hellcat the minute you let him out of the carrier and on the exam table. Really. He becomes evil.

Busy, Busy!

School is already in full swing with my first test rapidly approaching (Wed!). I'm only in my 3rd week and I am already stressing. Bah

In other new, we were able to come up with the full amount due for the next payment for Ireland! Yea! That's a load off.

I have a very busy few months ahead of me with getting the bats on their way (must start them SOON), the emerald isle and of course the my-entire-life-is-riding-on-this surgery. I can.not.wait. for that glorious day to finally be upon me. Its been a long and expensive road getting to this point and I am absolutely terrified that something will come unhinged and my insurance will deny it. I don't even know how I would deal with that.

anyway =) off to eat dinner and start the long arduous math homework.

this IS important...really

because now I no longer drive single-handedly because I have a coffee mug in my other hand. Precarious indeed.

Whomever invented travel mugs....not to mention cute travel mugs. I thank you.

Getting down to the wire....

Ireland is coming up fast. We have been on a quest to scrape up the next payment due in a few weeks by rummaging through our stuff and deciding what can be sold for some moolah.

I keep thinking that I am going to find something that I forgot I had that is so awesome that it will sell for serious dough. I can't help thinking back to a beanie baby I once had when they all the rage a long time ago that a woman offered $250 cash for. It got me a plane ticket to New Orleans. Madness, that beanie baby thing. Bizarre thinking back to it. It's amusing to me that I have maybe 2 or 3 now, bats and cats, and they are used as snuggle buddies for any new rehab bats I get in. ha!

Not counting on those this time around.

Lazy Day

Spent all of today doing pretty much nothing. And it felt refreshing.

I have a to do list a mile long, deadlines to be met and brainstorming to do.

However, sometimes the brain just needs to recharge and the body needs a break.

So I took a cue from Piggy and curled up with a soft snuggley of my own and napped the afternoon away.

walk in the woods

we went on a little hike!

Super neat trail!

We painted the frontroom of the warehouse which will be turned into the retail space once we open our doors to the public in February (eep!). Since we are focusing mostly on reptiles, we chose to do a southwest theme. Now my inspiration was actually a New Orleans home that I found on a google image search pictured here (kathyprice.typepad.com)

Are the colors awesome or what? It has that adobe, mexican desert vibe to it. We had decided on a terra cotta color before searching for decor ideas so we knew that would be our main color. However, we were stuck on the accent colors so this pic brought it all together for us. I love the muted off white trim and the pop of bright blue. We have a very small space so we will have to incorporate a bit more blue and the off white but this is what we ended up with so far.

I like it. I think it will all come together nicely once we build the shelves and pretty it up a bit.

We spent New Years Eve (as in the mister, Mariana and I) at home playing Dark Souls and catching up on Dexter (just started season 5). At the stroke of midnight we headed outside and watched the neighborhood fireworks and choked down sipped champagne. It was a pleasant night but not particularly different than most others (except for the champagne and fireworks)

New Years Eve in recent years hasnt been as monumental as those passed. Not sure why. There really isn't any where I would rather spend then at my home ringing in the new year. Home is where I am happiest. I feel safe here and comfortable.

Looking back at 2011, Im not sad to see it go. However, I dont want to start 2012 drudging up the pitfalls of 2011. Honestly, I dont know why, personally, it was such a poor year. I just wasnt happy most of the time. Chris told me that I tend to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders, likening me to Atlas. If I had the muscles to handle it like the latter, it probably wouldnt have been so bad. However, I am not a particularly strong person. I get by but not without taking damage (I have been watching chris play way to many video games=) It's starting to wear me down.

But, 2012 is a new year, a fresh start in some aspects. I am a little apprehensive about resolutions (other than the one I made last month), because I have never stuck with them. Maybe thats part of the problem. I make all these big promises to myself but always let myself down.

Anyway, I am grateful for what I have and I really do realize that it could be so so much worse. I have a roof over my head, food to eat and healthcare. All possible because of one person who loves me. Thats pretty special.

Its funny but a Monty Python tune popped into my head this morning and its been playing itself over and over in my head all day. It just popped in there and puts things in a little bit more perspective, in a jolly way:

Words to live by =)